Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
