Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
