her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
