areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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