no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
