i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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