If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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