Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Randomize
