He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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