I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
