Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
