if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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