Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize