apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize