she was so not down for the gang bang
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
