That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Randomize
