By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
