if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
