is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
