You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
