i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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