3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
