Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
