Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
