I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
