I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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