ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
