your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
