"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I could fuck to npr.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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