you would pick up someone in the library
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize
