Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
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