I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
