What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize