He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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