i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
