I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Randomize
