There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
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