But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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