he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
being pregnant is like rehab
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
