Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Randomize
