As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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