Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
