She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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