just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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