its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Randomize
