Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Randomize
