um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize