problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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