We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Randomize