everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
