So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
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