After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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