I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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